Martial Rape - Ankit Khadgi

This is something different that we people may not think about. We are living in the conservative society where our norms & values are more important than our happiness and choice.  This week I found something interesting that is common but not spoken openly in our society.  An article written by Mr.Ankit Khadgi about the “Marital Rape” that was published in The Himalayan Times, which makes us to know about marital rape and think about it.

He says “Marital Rape is one of the chronic forms of violence that a spouse suffers from as an intercourse. In many countries, it is still unrecognized by law. Also known as spousal rape, it started getting recognition during the second half of the twentieth century.

In Nepal where sex is still considered as a taboo, the spouses who have been raped by their own husbands have not come publicly to seek justice. Legally in 2006 A.D, the Supreme Court of Nepal declared the sex without dual consent is rape and punishable by law. The punishment was three to six months imprisonment with bail. But with the amendment of the law last year the jail term has increased up to five years and is considered a non bail able offence. The main reason for the spouses becoming less vocal about the marital rape is their dependency on their husbands. The husbands are worshipped like gods and it’s the duty of the wife to fulfil every needs of her husband whether she wants to or not.

Even if they share their problems with their family members, their voices are subdued as they concern the ‘prestige’ of the family in the society. Marital rape affects the victim physically and psychologically. The sexual violence triggers a woman’s mind so traumatically that she cannot have a peaceful mind. Marital rape breaks the trust and intimacy in a marriage relationship.

Criminalization of marital rape is still not prevalent in most of the countries. In India forced sex in a marriage is a crime only when the wife is below 14. China, Afghanistan, Pakistan and Saudi Arabia are some countries that do not criminalize marital rape. Marital rape has not found the coverage it needs. The definition of rape is confined to only when the criminal is a stranger or an acquaintance. Even if the criminal is the husband that doesn’t mean it is not rape.

Most of the women do not publicly speak about it even if they are affected as they believe it to be a part of their relationship with their husband.
The portrayal of the victim is also very much critical too. Those who are raped are presented as depressive, suffering weak persons who seek support. The boldness of the women who are fighting for their rights gets little coverage. The victim is usually reluctant to seek justice outside the home. Sex should never be forced. It’s one’s personal choice whether to have sex and when to have.”

Marital Rape need to be taken in a serious note and need to speak up openly because there is no any space for any crime.
we as a person as well need to respect every individuals choice and decision so that we will be having happy and peaceful life & relationship.

Writer- Ankit Khadgi